Since I woke up today
I've been struggling to breathe.
Choking on your name
Asking you not to leave.
It happened again,
I saw you in my dream.
I'm still trying to catch my breath
Trying not to scream.
I need to wipe these tears
I need to blur your face.
Force this heart back into gear,
make it regain its normal pace.
So I'll go get my pills
And I'll bring out the liquor.
Keep on lying to myself
Saying "today I really don't miss her".
But I'm haunted.
Can't get you off my head.
I wish that I would die,
For you to be the one suffering instead.
Why did we fight that night?
How could I let you drive away?
If i knew that you'd been drinking
I should have forced you to stay
is the anniversary of your death.
I've been trying not to think of you,
But I'm crying, still short of breath.
I take out my wallet
Where I still hold your picture.
Wondering if I'll meet you soon
Thanks to this pill and liquor mixture.
But I feel nothing
I've been drinking this all morning
My heart still hasn't given out
The only pain comes from this mourning.
Are these pills not good?
Is this liquor not enough?
Is the only thing that hurts me now
When I think about you, love?
I miss you
I need you and you're not here
I'm about ready to pass out
And repeat this all next year